Reflections and new beginnings

Since I am about to start my last semester of seminary (tomorrow), I was thinking about the past 2 years and how seminary has been.  It's been an interesting ride, that's for sure.  It hasn't been what I expected.  If you asked me 2 years ago what I thought seminary was like, I would have told you that I hoped to find people devoted to their faith and the church, were serious about studying theology academically, and who are devoted, friendly, and "non-dramatic" people.  I thought I would find people who know who they are, what they want, and what they hope to become.  I thought I would make friends who would always be there in the future when some of us have our own churches, people that we could call and talk to about certain issues.  I thought I would find reasonable, rational people who wanted nothing more than to learn, serve the church, and be in fellowship with other Christians.  However, I have discovered that seminary is hardly anything like this.  Am I disappointed?  A little...do I have regrets?  No.  Would I do it all over again?  Yes.  I have learned a lot about theology, but I have learned even more about myself and about people.  Since I've been in seminary, I have known alcoholics, drug addicts, compulsive liars, people who will do just about anything for attention, and people who mentally abuse and manipulate others.  A lot of people come to seminary to try to "fix" themselves or be "saved" from something.  What these people don't realize is that going to school to receive a masters of divinity does not automatically fix everything.  Instead, they end up dragging other people down with them some of the time, depending too heavily on others, and digging themselves deeper into the hole in which they find themselves.  A lot of people may rely on drugs or alcohol to get them through.  I feel like I've seen just about every kind of person while I've been in seminary.  But the good news is that I have learned a lot about the kinds of people I may see while serving a church.  Did I expect to find these people while in school?  No...but it has really been a blessing in disguise.  We are not all perfect, and that is really what being a Christian is about anyway, right?  We are all seeking forgiveness, love, acceptance, people to rely on and befriend us.  I have just found that many people go about finding these things in the wrong way.   I would like to one day understand why places like a seminary or divinity school attracts people who really just need a good therapist or rehab program.  

All of this is not to say that I have not met anyone in seminary who is not "crazy" or here for the wrong reasons.  I have made a handful of good friends and have met some people, unfortunately a small amount, that are committing themselves to the church for the right reasons.  I have learned that sometimes the only people you can depend on are yourself and God, or a best friend (when it comes to school), and always my family.  And of course, I have learned that nothing is exactly how I may picture it.  I am a planner, and nothing can really be planned.  As I sit here watching the snow fall, YES, in ATLANTA, I am reminded of how much I love Indiana and can't wait to go back. While seminary has been an interesting ride, it is time to switch to a new, exciting, and better one.  So as I enter my last semester of seminary, I will continue to learn and grow, and "become something new and grand."